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» 8mm Forum   » General Yak   » Abandon Hope, All Ye Who Enter Here… (a quiz) (Page 1)

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Author Topic: Abandon Hope, All Ye Who Enter Here… (a quiz)
Bill Brandenstein
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1623
From: California
Registered: Aug 2007


 - posted April 01, 2013 06:18 AM      Profile for Bill Brandenstein   Email Bill Brandenstein   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
ABANDON HOPE, ALL YE WHO ENTER HERE…
You MIGHT be a film geek if you…
(This is a test! Keep score! Hope you don't mind poking a little fun at our hobby!)

Own a projector that you didn’t get from a relative
+10 points

Own multiple projectors (working or not)
+10 points for each of the first 3
+20 points for each of projectors 4-6
+30 points for projector #7 and higher
+9,000 points if you lost count after 35

Ever found an abandoned, functional projector accidentally
-30 if in a building of some kind
-40 if it was in a storage unit/garage
-50 if it was in a dumpster

Own multiple projectors because you own a movie theater -150 points

Have projectors for more than one format
+25 points per additional format
-200 if you’re a professional film preservationist
+100 if you dream of becoming a film preservationist someday

Would rather thread up a projector than watch TV +25

Your spouse watches TV anyway while you watch your films +45

Your spouse left you because of your films +145

Your spouse almost always views with you -50

Your spouse collects too -150

Think film looks better than VHS -20

Think film (excepting 35mm, of course) looks better than DVD +20

Think film looks better than Blu-ray (again except 35mm) +120

Own more than one screen +10 per screen you own

Collect commercially-produced films (estimate how many titles you own, divide by 2) +x/2

Have friends (former?) over to make them watch movies in your collection +50

Have collected certain films just because the reel designs look cool +75

Ever travel more than 2 hours’ driving distance to visit collector’s events or shows +100

Ever travel more than 7 hours’ driving distance to visit collector’s events or shows +300

Ever travel more than 3 hours’ driving distance to nab a GS-1200 at a steal of a price -200

Make money as a film dealer -75

Still make your own movies, on film, not video -200

Are always looking for better throw-to-screen options at your house (“Now if I just moved this furniture over there, yanked these curtains/pictures off here, hung a screen there, or punched a hole in this here wall…”) +50

Have a dedicated projection area in your house +50

Also, actually have it as an enclosed booth +60

Replaced your garage work bench with an editing bench +70

Replaced the car(s) in your garage with projectors, long-play reel equipment, storage racks, etc. +80

Have a dedicated freezer or refrigerator at home just for storing valuable prints +90

Haven’t eaten at home lately due to lack of refrigerator space +190

When you sleep, you dream about reels turning and projectors humming +20

When you close your eyes, you daydream about reels turning and projectors humming +200

Go to a theater, and spend as much time looking at the booth ports (and what’s going on behind them) as you do the screen +25

Go to a theater, and count the changeover cues or countdown times +50

Go to a theater and count the splices during the show +75

You insist on only going to film-based theaters -100

Ask for a booth tour whenever you go to a theater for the first time +50

Are a professional theater projectionist, so you give the tours -300

While stuck in the bathroom, you stare at the little square floor tiles, visually grouping them into an aspect ratio grid +50

Imagine custom car wheels looking cooler if they were only reels +50

Go to others’ homes, meeting halls, patios, or classrooms, and imagine in your mind how you would best utilize the space for projectors and a screen as a screening room/area +200

Have your film collection and/or equipment specifically mentioned in your will +400
.
.
.
.
KEY TO YOUR SCORE:
Negative score to 195:
NOVICE: You’re safe. Life is still balanced and the Film Bug hasn’t bitten you hard, or at least you’re fairly immune. Or coolly professional. It’s not too late to turn back!

200-395:
ENTHUSIAST: The Film Bug has definitely bitten you. Beware. It tends to infest one’s life in mind-altering ways. Turn back while you can, if you can!

400-645:
SERIOUS HOBBYIST: Filmish Folly is a major preoccupation, perhaps even a distraction, in your life. Run for your life! You might still escape. Then again, maybe not.

650-995:
PROFESSIONALLY SMITTEN: You think about film stuff so much that you’d best get therapy. Or at least step out for some fresh air and sunshine. Now. Right now. Rinse. Repeat.

1,000 and above:
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE: You are so severely afflicted as to be beyond therapy, thus requiring hospitalization, perhaps brain surgery, to attempt to correct the ailment. Either that, or you make your living somewhere in the film industry. In either case you have earned everyone’s sympathies, and your spouse everyone’s condolences!

Happy April Fool's Day, everyone!

[ April 01, 2013, 11:51 PM: Message edited by: Bill Brandenstein ]

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Rob Young.
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1567
From: Cheshire, U.K.
Registered: Dec 2003


 - posted April 01, 2013 08:54 AM      Profile for Rob Young.     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Genuine LOL!

Brilliant Bill!

I'm an April film fool and have to admit it!

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Pasquale DAlessio
Film God

Posts: 3523
From: Bristol,RI, USA
Registered: May 2010


 - posted April 01, 2013 11:45 AM      Profile for Pasquale DAlessio   Email Pasquale DAlessio   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Excellent job Bill!

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Fabrizio Mosca
Master Film Handler

Posts: 344
From: Milano, Italy
Registered: Jan 2004


 - posted April 01, 2013 01:58 PM      Profile for Fabrizio Mosca   Email Fabrizio Mosca   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
OMG.... (for MY result!!) [Big Grin]

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Bill Phelps
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1440
From: USA
Registered: Jan 2009


 - posted April 01, 2013 07:34 PM      Profile for Bill Phelps     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
It was over for me after the second question....9,010 points. [Big Grin]

I have to say it really hit home after realizing I do make aspect ratios out of bathroom floor tiles....I actually do that!

Bill [Smile]

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Bill Brandenstein
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1623
From: California
Registered: Aug 2007


 - posted April 01, 2013 07:43 PM      Profile for Bill Brandenstein   Email Bill Brandenstein   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
That is a true LOL, Bill, and thanks for everyone's comments so far!

At least my score isn't 4 digits...

But it seriously does amaze me how a childhood interest in making and/or showing films has turned into THIS! All because of finding a little projector in a camera shop in 2001!

You know, the one question I forgot to put in concerns whether we were the ones who ran classroom films back in our youth, if we're old enough for our former schools to have made use of such things. And I can't decide if it should be a positive or negative score!

By the way, Bill, WHAT are you doing with all those projectors? We might have to give you a pass on that 9,000 if you're opening a museum!

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Bill Phelps
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1440
From: USA
Registered: Jan 2009


 - posted April 01, 2013 07:53 PM      Profile for Bill Phelps     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I ask myself the same question. I'd say 15 or so don't work or have some issues and I keep them for parts if needed. I received quite a few free from people giving them away. I currently have 2 super 8, 2 standard 8 and one 16mm projector set up and ready to go. I am not married by the way! And of course you have to have back up units...right? [Big Grin]

My museum is in Massillon Ohio...admission is free!

Even if you take away 9000 my score is still 1,465...I'm doomed!!!

Bill [Smile]

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Janice Glesser
Film Goddess

Posts: 3298
From: Sunnyvale, CA USA
Registered: Sep 2011


 - posted April 01, 2013 09:58 PM      Profile for Janice Glesser   Email Janice Glesser   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
OMG...I've only been in this hobby for a year and a half and I scored 1190. You forced me to add up my projectors which has blossomed up to 31. I now question if this is a hobby or an obsession [Confused]

Lots of fun Bill [Razz]

--------------------
Janice

"I'm having a very good day!"
Richard Dreyfuss - Let It Ride (1989).

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Bill Phelps
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1440
From: USA
Registered: Jan 2009


 - posted April 01, 2013 10:05 PM      Profile for Bill Phelps     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I'm having lots of fun!!! [Smile]

Bill [Big Grin]

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Matt McBride
Film Handler

Posts: 62
From: Starkville, MS USA
Registered: Oct 2012


 - posted April 01, 2013 11:07 PM      Profile for Matt McBride   Email Matt McBride   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Well, I definitely hit over 1,000. Though my wife probably could've deduced that I was obsessive-compulsive about this hobby. I am very doomed and I am only 30. Yikes [Eek!]

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Lee Mannering
Film God

Posts: 3119
From: The Projection Box
Registered: Nov 2006


 - posted April 02, 2013 10:30 AM      Profile for Lee Mannering     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Excellent idea Bill but I daren’t face the reality if I took into account the 35mm as well! [Eek!]

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Christian Bjorgen
Jedi Master Film Handler

Posts: 996
From: Kvinnherad, Norway
Registered: Oct 2009


 - posted April 02, 2013 05:25 PM      Profile for Christian Bjorgen   Author's Homepage   Email Christian Bjorgen   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
My results:

Own a projector that you didn’t get from a relative
10 points

Own multiple projectors (working or not)
10 points for each of the first 3 + 20 for fourth = 50 points

Have projectors for more than one format
+25 points per additional format = Super 8, 8mm and 16mm = 75 points

Your spouse watches TV anyway while you watch your films
45 points

Think film (excepting 35mm, of course) looks better than DVD
20 points

Collect commercially-produced films (estimate how many titles you own, divide by 2)
Isn't this all films? If such; 140 films/2 = 70 points

Have friends (former?) over to make them watch movies in your collection
Every christmas! 50 points

Ever travel more than 7 hours’ driving distance to visit collector’s events or shows +
BFCC in October, about 8-10 hours with car, boat and plane. 300 points

Are always looking for better throw-to-screen options at your house (“Now if I just moved this furniture over there, yanked these curtains/pictures off here, hung a screen there, or punched a hole in this here wall…”)
I'm building a home theater to solve the issue! 50 points

Have a dedicated projection area in your house - Also, actually have it as an enclosed booth
Drawn into our building plans for next year. 50+60 points = 110

Go to a theater, and spend as much time looking at the booth ports (and what’s going on behind them) as you do the screen +25

Go to a theater, and count the changeover cues or countdown times +50

Go to a theater and count the splices during the show +75

GRAND TOTAL: 930 points!

650-995:
PROFESSIONALLY SMITTEN: You think about film stuff so much that you’d best get therapy. Or at least step out for some fresh air and sunshine. Now. Right now. Rinse. Repeat.


--------------------
Well who’s on first? Yeah. Go ahead and tell me. Who. The guy on first. Who. The guy playin’ first base. Who. The guy on first. Who is on first! What are you askin’ me for? I’m askin’ you!

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Bill Brandenstein
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1623
From: California
Registered: Aug 2007


 - posted April 02, 2013 06:42 PM      Profile for Bill Brandenstein   Email Bill Brandenstein   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
You guys are good sports. Confession is good for the soul! A little insantity keeps us sane!

My score at present: 630. I don't think that's honest though, I should be a category higher... just ask my wife...

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Michael O'Regan
Film God

Posts: 3083
From: Essex, UK
Registered: Oct 2007


 - posted April 02, 2013 06:51 PM      Profile for Michael O'Regan   Email Michael O'Regan   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Nice quiz [Smile]

I only scored 95, though.

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Bill Brandenstein
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1623
From: California
Registered: Aug 2007


 - posted April 02, 2013 07:28 PM      Profile for Bill Brandenstein   Email Bill Brandenstein   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Congratulations, Michael, that only means you're not entirely rabid about it yet! Either that, or I'm missing some items in the quiz (e.g., add a hundred for each 1,000 posts on the forum [Cool] )!

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Michael O'Regan
Film God

Posts: 3083
From: Essex, UK
Registered: Oct 2007


 - posted April 02, 2013 08:05 PM      Profile for Michael O'Regan   Email Michael O'Regan   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Add just 10 points for every time I dream about being back in the projection booth in Cork and I'd be pretty well up there with some of you guys.
[Big Grin]

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Zechariah Sporre
Jedi Master Film Handler

Posts: 550
From: Ladysmith, WI U.S.A.
Registered: Dec 2010


 - posted April 03, 2013 05:59 PM      Profile for Zechariah Sporre   Email Zechariah Sporre   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Great quiz you put together. I only score 430 though. I'll have to keep working at it [Smile]

--------------------
There is a fine line between a hobby and a mental illness

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David Ollerearnshaw
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1366
From: Penistone Sheffield UK
Registered: Oct 2012


 - posted April 03, 2013 07:30 PM      Profile for David Ollerearnshaw   Author's Homepage   Email David Ollerearnshaw   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Good laugh that. 1,000 and above: OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE I always have a few glasses of wine when I watch a film or perhaps a whiskey (single malt). I sometimes feel like a film if I have too much I turn RED [Big Grin]

Went to see Dr who! prescribed Therm-O-Film 4 times a day. Followed by 2 anti-vinegar tablets.

Have to go to hospital for a special screening soon, must be 70mm. Had some advice I need to rewind or could have been relax.

--------------------
I love the smell of film in the morning.

http://www.thereelimage.co.uk/

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Bill Brandenstein
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1623
From: California
Registered: Aug 2007


 - posted April 18, 2013 06:02 PM      Profile for Bill Brandenstein   Email Bill Brandenstein   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I am so had. My dear beloved wife came up with an addendum to this discussion. There is no escaping for me! This is what she wrote:

You Know Your Hubby Is a Film Nerd When:

- He points out all the flaws at the movie theaters

- Nothing magnetic is allowed in the house

- Every nook and cranny of the house is filled with films…

- …Including the shed, which reeks of vinegar

- He wrote the OTHER quiz

- When you vacuum the house, it picks up film and splice tape trims that got tracked everywhere

I’m toast. My kids offer no support, either!

(At least #4 and #6 are true only seasonally… oh, why am I bothering to say this, there’s no point)

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Thor Andre Karlsen
Film Handler

Posts: 50
From: Fredrikstad, Norway
Registered: Apr 2012


 - posted April 18, 2013 07:52 PM      Profile for Thor Andre Karlsen   Email Thor Andre Karlsen   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Scored 485, would have gotten more if all the theatres here haven't gone digital a few years back. [Frown]

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Timothy Ramzyk
Expert Film Handler

Posts: 220
From: Milwaukee,WI,USA
Registered: Nov 2006


 - posted April 27, 2013 02:58 AM      Profile for Timothy Ramzyk   Author's Homepage   Email Timothy Ramzyk   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I scored 740 though I have but one 16mm projector that doesn't work, and as the quiz doesn't say "film projector" I included my video projector. [Eek!]

The devil's in the details [Wink]

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Bill Brandenstein
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1623
From: California
Registered: Aug 2007


 - posted April 01, 2015 08:18 AM      Profile for Bill Brandenstein   Email Bill Brandenstein   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
It's been 2 years, we have new members, and it's the funniest day of the year! So BUMP! Enjoy!

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Harm Jan Heling
Film Handler

Posts: 33
From: Dutch, living in the Czech Republic
Registered: Jan 2013


 - posted April 01, 2015 10:02 AM      Profile for Harm Jan Heling   Author's Homepage   Email Harm Jan Heling   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
15 years ago I would have a high-score :-) nice one, thanks for the bump!

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Andrew Woodcock
Film God

Posts: 7477
From: Manchester Uk
Registered: Aug 2012


 - posted April 01, 2015 10:29 AM      Profile for Andrew Woodcock         Edit/Delete Post 
Just brilliant fun Bill! My score is also ridiculously high I am ashamed to say! [Wink]

--------------------
"C'mon Baggy..Get with the beat"

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Osi Osgood
Film God

Posts: 9917
From: #399R K.O.A. Mountian Home, ID. 83647
Registered: Jul 2005


 - posted April 01, 2015 12:07 PM      Profile for Osi Osgood   Author's Homepage   Email Osi Osgood   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Brilliant Bill! I don't want to answer how much of a film geek I am! (I measure rather low. or is that high [Smile] )!

--------------------
"All these moments will be lost in time, just like ... tears, in the rain. "

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